The Ballad of Steve Bangalan (Part 2)



I close my eyes and he’s smiling back,

I open my eyes and he’s not here.

I wake up and my eyes are dried of tears,

For every night I dream of you.

And each morning I bid ado,

I cry and cry to say goodbye.

But all I want and all I need,

Is but you my darling Steve.

The 152s: A Prime Spark

I thought it strange that I should have fallen for a stranger so easily, but then again there was a familiarity about her.  She had big bright eyes, and a huge smile with near perfect teeth.  And there beneath the stars, in Steve’s backyard we shared a moment.  It was quiet respite, just the two of us cuddled together for warmth, and I pointing up at the stars.  “What do you think that one’s called?”

Orion's Belt

…

Many of us know the legendary parties that Steve threw.  Every summer there was the annual BBQ culminating in the month of May (The Birthday Month).  Every year it got bigger, because mostly our family grew.  We would meet new friends, and together with old friends we would celebrate the three Birthdays… It used to be the four Birthdays, but friends did come and leave, changes were inevitable, but the core was there.  The family never changed, because family is Family. 

I looked forward to that barbeque every year.  My birthday was in December and it was unlikely I would have an outdoor BBQ party, or so I thought.  One year, after a homecoming from college,  Steve asked me how I wanted to celebrate my birthday.  I told him, I wanted to have one of his legendary BBQ parties in the midst of winter.  I also volunteered his house.  The type of guy Steve was – he opened his home and his resources to me.  Honestly, I normally dislike celebrating my birthday.  I’m reluctant, but there was something irresistible about having a Bangalan party for my birthday.  It was one of the best Birthdays ever. 

That night I met her. 

…

It shouldn’t have been that difficult to leave.  I had done so a dozen times if not more.  Going back to school, driving away to college,  should have been easy.  But her smile was just on my mind.  The thought of all the parties I’ve missed while I was away.  The thought of all the people my friends call friends that I have yet to meet.  How can something so beautiful pass by in my life, and this was the first I’ve ever met her.  What if this would be the last?  My mind was ablaze with questions, wonderment, and longing. 

I’ve held off on Love.  Infatuation, I had plenty – but the Spark… the spark was rare.  Akin to divine inspiration, it fills you with this energy that fuels this millions of thought per second madness and clarity.  You can very well be happy with this girl – with her there is a way. 

…

You see, if it were not for Steve, I would never have had met her.  Sadly the story of her and me would never come to be; it never came into fruition.  Where I thought the 152s were stories of a girl and a possible Love that never came to be, where I thought it was a story of ambition and the sacrifices we make, I was not entirely on point.  At its core, the 152s, was about Family & Friendship.  It’s about you Steve, and how you help steer my ambition in search of the core, in search of home.

…

I’m helpless to alter history.  I can’t change the fact that some heartless bastard ripped you from this world.  I can’t change the fact that you meant so much to me, and that this hurts so damn bad.  I don’t know if there will be Justice, or if I’ll get closure.  All I know is, you took me in and made me Family, and now the world is dimmer without your light.  May your light shine on in Heaven, Brother. 

 

The Ballad of Steve Bangalan and the 152s:  Part 1 |  Part 3